It’s a truth universally acknowledge that I hate my dog. To be fair, he’s a chihuahua, he’s ridiculously grumpy, and I have reason to believe he is Satan incarnate. He detests people, some times including those from my family. Strangers are absolute evil in his eyes and anyone who tries to deliver anything to the door will have an attempt made on their ankles. There is another important thing to know about my dog: He’s gotten really fat. He got neutered a couple of months ago and basically lost all motivation to do anything. Add that to the fact that it’s currently winter in Canada so he never leaves the house, and you have a dog that has put on a quarter of his own weight in a rather short span of time. While I find this incredibly funny, it’s also a little bit sad. You see, the life span of Chihuahuas decrease when they are overweight. That and his whining to get more food is really pathetic. But yes, my dog is a complete asshole and I think that’s why he fits into my family so much, because if you think about enough, we’re all kind of assholes.